Detroit Lions topics that are safe or dangerous with your family at Thanksgiving dinner
The Deroit Lions are going to come up at Thanksgiving dinner, be prepared
Thanksgiving is going down on Thursday, and it’s one of those crazy times of year when the whole family gets together, and you have to worry about what you can talk about and what you can’t.
It’s not all about politics and whatnot, though; there are Detroit Lions things that are safe, and then there are Lions things that aren’t. Let’s talk about them.
Safe Detroit Lions topics
Obscure Lions stats that are fun to teach people about
You can be the nerd at the table when you explain how weird it is that Lions receivers have only drawn one defensive pass interference call this season and only one last year.
Your grandmother will be amazed by this one.
How the Lions’ defensive line is actually better than the Eagles’ defensive line
Your uncle Steve won’t believe you when you tell him that, despite a rough game against Jameis Winston, the Lions have more sacks, more pressures, and are better against the run than the defensive line they’re 100% sure is the reincarnation of the 1985 Bears line.
Your favorite Barry Sanders or Calvin Johnson highlight
By the time you get two plates and a few beers in, this will sort of just come up anyway.
Your uncle Jerry will bring up how nobody moved like Sanders out there and how he watched him shimmy out of the pile against the Cowboys. Then, he’ll marvel at how Sanders used to just hand the ball to an official, and right before he starts to complain about how players celebrate today, jump in and start mentioning Megatron highlights like the one he had against three Bengals players. This one is sort of a two-man job.
That playoff win over the Rams
Man, what a night that was, right? The lights were brighter, and the air was crisper. People were crying in the stands, and everyone was hungover on Monday. We all waited so long for that moment, and when Jared Goff took a knee, it was over, man, just…man. Get ready to tear up.
How the rest of the NFC North has a tough schedule
Be prepared for this one. Uncle Steve will tell you that it’s over for the Lions. You can be there to tell him that the Packers have to play the Bears twice, the red-hot Ravens, and the red-hot Broncos.
Then tell him how the Bears still have to play those two games against the Packers, the 49ers, and the Lions. Then tell him the Vikings play the Seahawks this Sunday, and a loss there is pretty much the end for them.
The Moon
If you’re one of those weird moon people, you can be the guy to tell everyone that the Lions will be playing on a Waxing Crescent Moon, and that the Lions are 10-1 on these Moons in the last three seasons. That includes going 3-0 this season.
You can also tell them that the Lions are 7-4 all-time on Thanksgiving games played on Waxing Crescent Moons, and they are 3-0 against the Packers in those games.
Dangerous Detroit Lions topics
The 2024 NFC Championship game
That’s all you really have to say. Actually, don’t even say that.
The 2025 Divisional game
Don’t talk about this one either.
Any time the refs ruined your life
Don’t talk about the following moments:
- The batted ball against the Seahawks
- The phantom face mask against the Packers
- The Justin Forsett touchdown against the Texans
- The Calvin Johnson rule
- The 10-second run-off against the Falcons
- The Dan Skipper thing against the Cowboys
- Rock-Ya-Sin’s DPI against the Eagles
- Am I forgetting anything?
Jameson Williams, depending on how the game goes
You know someone at the table will say something really dumb here. This is your chance to change the subject and throw something else Uncle Bob’s way.
Prevent him from talking about his celebrations, his life outside the game, the suspensions, how he’s not getting targeted right now, and whatever else you think he could bring up. If Jamo goes off, it won’t matter. He’ll forget.
Detroit Lions News
Monday Overreaction: ‘The Lions pay players, then they regress, and podcasts are making the Lions bad’
Please stop saying these things
