Tennessee Titans As Halloween Candy: Perfect comparisons for Calvin Ridley, L’Jarius Sneed, Cam Ward, and interim coach Mike McCoy

Happy Halloween! It’s everybody’s favorite spooky time of year, and there’s no team in the NFL this year scarier than the Titans. They’re 1-7 by way of an all-time miracle in Arizona, they were the first team to fire their head coach, they’re projected to get the first overall pick in the draft again by ESPN’s FPI metrics, and they’re getting steamrolled on a weekly basis. What’s more frightening than that?

It also wouldn’t be a holiday without some gimmicky sportswriter themed-comparisons. And that’s what we’re here to do right now: the Titans as Halloween candy. A number of these might feel a bit mean-spirited, but listen… when you’re the worst team in football, that’s what you’ve earned. I promise it’s all in good fun! Here we go…

Calvin Ridley – Butterfinger

The most self-explanatory comp on the list! It’s right there in the name!

Ridley’s season so far has been marred by consistency and availability issues. He has a 15.8% drop rate at the midpoint of the season, which is easily a career-high. Cam Ward has suffered at the hands of receiver drops all year, and his top receiver has contributed to that.

T’Vondre Sweat – Snickers

T’Vondre is the heartiest candy bar on the market. “Snickers satisfies”, as they say. The big man on the interior has missed a good chunk of the year, but in his couple games back he’s recorded 2 sacks, 2 TFLs, and 10 total tackles. That’s been almost entirely without Jeffery Simmons alongside him to help out, too.

One final play on words here is the fact that T’Vondre is hilarious. If you didn’t hear this all-time spit take quote from him in the locker room this week, give it a listen:

Mike McCoy – Milk Duds

Sorry, Mike. Your tenure as interim head coach so far has been… rocky. Typically an interim comes in and loosens things up, both on and off the field. But McCoy has done more tightening than anything. It’s been a whole lot of the same on the field, far less insightful and interesting off of it, and two weeks into his tenure, he’s all but removed himself from consideration in January.

Cody Barton – candy corn

Candy Corn is a Halloween staple. It’s representative of the most festive elements of the season. And as an idea, or even in moderation, it’s good! But if you try eating a handful of it by itself, you quickly realize it’s just not that great. We all got real excited about Barton in the preseason, but so far this year, he’s left a good deal to be desired.

Tyjae Spears – Sour Patch Kids

Tyjae Spears has spent too much of his NFL career injured. He’s dealt with two ankles, two concussions, and a hamstring injury so far. He’s just not proven himself durable, which sure is sour. But when he’s out there on Sundays, boy is it sweet. He clearly has the juice that this team could use more of.

L’Jarius Sneed – Kit Kat

KitKat’s are great, and so was Sneed at his peak in Kansas City. He was nearly an All Pro! But the one thing KitKat’s are known for is breaking, and that’s all Sneed has done since coming to Tennessee. He’s only played around 40% of his total possible snaps with the Titans, and that number keeps dropping as he’s on IR again.

Chig Okonkwo- Skittles

Chig is an extremely colorful character. He’s got big tight end energy. And when he takes off with the ball, it’s like he wants to make every defender taste the rainbow.

But also like Skittles, he can sometimes feel like all sugar. He doesn’t bring a ton in the blocking game, and so far this year, the vast majority of his production has come late in games when things aren’t competitive.

Joey Slye – tape gum

Who didn’t love tape guy as a kid? It comes in a fun package, and you get to choose your portion and cut it off. You can eat the whole roll at once if you want to. But, if we’re being honest, how great is it really? Sure, it’s long, but there are better versions of gum out there. Slye’s range has been impressive this season no doubt, but he’s in a tough spot when compared to the guy he replaced: Nick Folk, the league’s most accurate kicker for years now.

Dan Moore – Hershey’s

Hershey’s is a staple. It’s also a key ingredient in many things, from other candies to desserts. But on its own, it’s just alright. Dan Moore has been a serviceable tackle his whole career, but he’s at his best when he’s one of the “worst” linemen you’re relying on. When he’s on an island, results may vary.

Kevin Zeitler – Hersey’s white chocolate

We couldn’t resist the white guy bit here. Guard Kevin Zeitler fits a similar category as Moore so far this year: fine, but you wish it was better. If he isn’t traded, I think both guys will look better down the stretch.

Roger McCreary, Jarvis Brownlee, Dennard Wilson – 3 Musketeers

It’s no secret Dennard Wilson has gotten the short end of the stick from the personnel department this year, and really since he’s been in Tennessee. His latest disappointment was losing two starting cornerbacks to low-return trades. It’s also no secret he liked both Jarvis and Roger, and his comments at the podium this week reflected that.

Chimere Dike – Reese’s

This one is simple: Dike is doing two things really well right now. Peanut butter and chocolate, baby. The rookie dual-returner took everybody by surprise at the beginning of the year with his juice on special teams, and now he’s taken advantage of limited depth on offense the past two weeks to lead the receiving room. He’s caught 11 of 12 targets for 163 yards and a touchdown in the past two games.

Cam Ward – Now and Later 

And finally, a pure play on words. I don’t pretend to love Now and Laters, and I’m not sure many of you will either. This comp merely reflects the fact that what Cam Ward has done so far has been show small flashes of progress and reasons for optimism, but we’re all still banking on what he develops into later. Patience!