Losing a parent is never easy. In fact, it is one of the hardest things anyone will ever have to do. 

Now imagine doing that at 20 years old, having to work through all the emotions, try to come to terms with the loss, and attempt to keep moving forward. Now imagine doing that as a 20-year-old, two-time Notre Dame captain with a 2026 season opener only a few days away.

Those were the cards Notre Dame star safety Adon Shuler was dealt this week when it was announced by him that his father, Don Shuler, had passed away.

When I first heard the news, it was something I didn’t want to address, and didn’t want to talk about, for obvious reasons. It was definitely something I didn’t want to talk about publicly or even write about. 

But then I saw Adon stand up there on the podium in front of the local Notre Dame media on Wednesday in preparation for the Fighting Irish game against the Wisconsin Badgers this weekend at Lambeau Field on Sunday. He stood there with such a level of perseverance and class that I once again, for what feels like the millionth time, have marveled about the person and the young man that Adon Shuler is. 

At that moment, I made the decision that I needed to write something. Not for myself. To remember Don Shuler, the Notre Dame father and friend who touched everyone he met. 

For anybody who ever came in contact with Don, or Adon’s mother Fran, or anybody else a part of the Shuler family, you understand how special these people are. It didn’t take much of a conversation to understand what made Don so unique, and he deserves for me to write about him, even if it’s hard.

A friendship born from recruiting

When I first got on the Notre Dame beat in 2022, Adon Shuler was already committed to the Notre Dame 2023 recruiting class. In the world of recruiting, and specifically covering it, you are posed with the job of understanding and collecting as much intel and information on these young men as humanly possible. 

You have to in order to grow in this industry. For a person in my position, it didn’t make much sense to spend a ton of time talking to Don or Adon Shuler. They were already in the class. They were known commodities. 

Shuler’s story had already been told.

It was by mere happenstance that I came into contact with Don via DMs, and a few things quickly became apparent. He loved his son, his family, and Notre Dame football. You could somehow hear in text how much he loved his son, how excited he was for his future, and how proud he was of each one of his sons: Adon, Donte, and Donovan.

Eventually that relationship moved past the Twitter DMs, and phone numbers were exchanged. It took me about two phone conversations to start to feel Don Shuler was more than just a father of a recruit I covered. He was a friend. 

I have been fortunate enough over the years to get to know him, his family, and understand at an even deeper level what makes that group so different.

More than a recruit’s father

From meeting him in person for the first time at the All-American Bowl in San Antonio, once again getting the opportunity to see his son play alongside the best players in the 2023 recruiting class and having a standout week, to last fall, being able to meet up with him on campus at Notre Dame and just chat, seeing him in his element in South Bend, wearing Notre Dame memorabilia. 

That includes several podcast appearances in between.

For anybody who followed Don during that 2023 recruiting class cycle, you know there was no bigger supporter of that 2023 group than him. From going on those visits to taking pictures with the crew, from Keon Keeley to Brenan Vernon and the rest of the talented players who either signed or at one point were committed to the class.

Don became a major asset for head coach Marcus Freeman and his staff on the recruiting trail, and he helped put together a tremendous group of players, and more importantly, great young men.

The last time I saw my friend

This offseason, Don invited me to Adon’s 2nd Annual Youth Football Camp. I was supposed to go the year before, but my babysitting options fell through late and I wasn’t able to make it up to Irvington High School. 

That changed this year, and I’m very happy it did, because several weeks ago I didn’t know it would be the last time I would see my friend in person. But that’s the cards we were dealt, as Adon said so eloquently during his media availability this week.

After that event, I asked Don if he wanted to come on A to Z Sports Notre Dame and talk about his son, the 2026 Notre Dame season, and Adon graduating from Notre Dame this past May. He of course agreed, because any chance he could get to talk about his son, his family, and the things that made him happy, he took it. 

The public got a chance to hear that interview and see once again the energy and enthusiasm Don shared with everyone, one last time.

But lucky enough, that wasn’t my last interaction. A couple days after the fact, I had a chance to talk to him on the phone. What I thought was going to be a 10-minute conversation ended up being about 45 minutes. During that call, it’s hard to sum up exactly what we talked about. 

We talked about Adon, we talked about Donte, we talked about Donovan. He asked about my girls, my two daughters. We spoke about them, talked about the summer, going back to school. We even talked about a little vegan ice cream shop in Princeton, New Jersey, called Bent Spoon.

It felt like we talked about everything and nothing during that phone call. But for anyone who knew Don, that was him. 

He was an easy person to talk to, and a person who always made sure you knew he was there. There wasn’t a Father’s Day that I didn’t get a text message, and every couple months he would always check in. He didn’t have to do that. He did it because I wasn’t just a media guy he gave small pieces of information to at times.

He was my friend.

This isn’t about me

As I wrap this up, I want people to understand writing this was not about me. It’s honestly why I didn’t want to write it to begin with. 

This is about Don. This is about Adon. This is about Fran. This is about Donte. This is about Donovan. This is about the Shuler family and everyone that this family, including Don, has had the ability to touch and make feel special.

My heart will break for Adon each and every gameday this fall, and every other day in between. But best believe, Don will be watching, and he will take every chance, wherever he is, to talk about his son. Because Adon is more than a great football player. He’s more than a Notre Dame captain. 

He’s everything that a father would want: a great person who will leave this world better than he found it. I know that because of the people who raised him. 

RIP Don Shuler. You were a great person, great husband, great father, great community member, and for me, a great friend.